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Barry Clang, 43, has been chopping up animals for the last twenty years at his butcher's shop in Maidstone. However, he has agreed to wipe the blood from his hands to tell Laurie Netanyohu what pleases him below his shirt.

Littlewoods cotton-rich, blue vest.
"This one takes me back to meeting my wife, Des'ree, in a refrigerator. She worked for my wholesaler, and I let her know that when she took me into the cold-store to select some prime pheasant I was feeling somewhat hot under the collar. Even now she thinks that this was due to the steamy embrace we stole behind half a cow, but really the warm glow was down to this garment."

BHS 'T-shirt' style vest.
"As a butcher I find my appearance on the shop floor is paramount when providing tip-top customer service. Therefore, this number means I can take off my shirt when preparing meat, keeping it whiter than white, whilst


stopping underarm sweat or hair from landing in yer pork chops."

Poundstretcher string vest.
"When I'm on the beach or waxing the car I want to forget about work and not have to wear my more formal butchery clothes. So this stringy number is a casual yet surprisingly warm item of leisurewear. Des'ree thinks it's pretty sexy too, and I like her in it as well."

Topsport running singlet.
"This is my fitness outfit, ha ha! I wear it if I'm going round to my mate Jim's. I call him 'The Jim', so I can say 'I'm just off down The Jim now', and people see my singlet and think I'm fit. The girls love it."

Since speaking to 'Catfood', Barry Clang has joined the Foreign Legion. fin

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